Who First Loved Us

by Renaissance Girl     

I keep forgetting how much I love the writings of Henri Nouwen. Someone gave me a photocopy of a page of a book of his about 5 years ago. They said they couldn’t remember what it was from, but I googled phrases from it until something matched: Henri Nouwen’s “Clowning in Rome.” And I devoured it — read it over and over. So I pulled it out tonight to re-visit. He talked about total openness to God. He climbed into my heart and pulled out the words I couldn’t find, that say that empty feeling we all have sometimes, that ache in our depths that can’t be relieved, is our space for God, “an openness to being loved first by God.”  And he talks about the importance of keeping that space set apart because, “without giving God the first place in our hearts in the midst of the city, we will ultimately fail in the hopeless attempt to fabricate peace and love by ourselves…. Become still and wait for God without anything to show or prove, or to argue…. Stop, wait, and trust that God fills our emptiness”.

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About Renaissance Girl

I moved to the Community with my family in 1988 when I was 10 - which gives away my current age! I am now a solemnly professed member - I work at Paraclete Press, the publishing arm of the Community and I love my job! I also sing in the choir Gloriæ Dei Cantores, and am a member of Elements Theatre Company and Spirit of America Band. As a Docent for the Church of the Transfiguration, I get to discover new things about the church every time I share it with someone else. When I'm not doing one of those activities, I love to spend time with my dog or my "extended family". There's a lot of variety in my life which keeps me energized - and I'm learning how to be more in the moment so whether I'm at a rehearsal, or making dinner in the kitchen with 5 girls, they all get 100% of me!

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